Let Me In
by AceOfHoenn
Summary: Monica chose Richard over Chandler. Three years later after being abused he tried to commit suicide. Will Chandler help her pick of the pieces, even though he risks having his heart broken again? AU. WARNING: Contains mentions of abuse, rape and attempted suicide! Nothing graphic though.


_A/N: Hey folks, I'm here with another fanfiction. This time it's a F.R.I.E.N.D.S. fic and a multi-chapter one at that! Getting my numbers up again after deleting some of my old, crappy fics. I should really continue with "Love and Loss," though… never mind. I'll get around to it once I get some inspiration. Have loads of ideas for tons of fandoms (Simpsons, F.R.I.E.N.D.S., Pokémon, Doctor Who, My Little Pony, Sonic the Hedgehog, etc.) but am too lazy to write them! It really is a sad existence, being a lazy but passionate writer…_

_The title of the fic comes from the song "The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get," by Morrissey. God, that song's been stuck in my head for days! All the chapter titles are going to come from lyrics from that song, even though it probably won't even make sense half of the time (they won't be in order either. You could have a lyric from the end of the song one chapter and a lyric from the star the next). Well anyway, hope you enjoy! _

_Summary: Monica chose Richard over Chandler. Three years later after being abused he tried to commit suicide. Will Chandler help her pick of the pieces, even though he risks having his heart broken again? AU._

_Couple: Mondler._

_Rating: T._

_Warnings: This fic contains mentions of abuse, rape and attempted suicide. Nothing graphic though!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own F.R.I.E.N.D.S., if I did, I wouldn't be a sad little fan girl writing fanfics in her bedroom on a school night. _

* * *

**Let Me In**

**Chapter 1: Your Mind's Landscape**

* * *

Monica felt her body slam painfully on to the ground. She didn't gasp, she didn't scream, she couldn't. She just let silent tears run down her face. This had been happening for so long, yet she couldn't gather the strength to tell anyway. She wore baggy clothes to cover her bruises, hoping that nobody would notice, which they hadn't, yet. Monica knew she should tell someone but yet a part of her still loved the man who was beating her, well, the _old_ him.

"Monica," let out a sour, lustful voice.

She hated what he had become, it frightened her. She was afraid of what he would to her if she told anyone about this, considering what he was doing now. He slammed her head against the wall, causing her to go dizzy.

"This is what you get for being a bad girl and not listening to me!" It sent chills down her spine.

Why had Richard turned into this monster that caused her so much pain! Why did she choose him? Why didn't she choose _him? He_ was sweet, _he_ was smart, _he _was caring, _he _would never do anything to hurt her. Then again, that's what she thought about Richard. She wished that she could go back in time and tell her younger self to make the opposite choice! She had considered going back to _him_, but she knew she couldn't after all she broke his heart.

The rest of the group had stopped talking to her, apart from Ross who only talked to her out of brotherly obligations. Joey wouldn't go near her after she broke _his_ heart and Phoebe stopped talking to her too. Rachel tried to keep talking to her for a while, but eventually stopped after she moved out to Florida with Richard. Her former best friend was angry at her anyway for choosing Richard. Ross had told her before about how much she broke _his_ heart and it hurt her and sometimes she felt like she deserved it.

"My Mon," Richard's disgusting voice snapped her out of her thoughts, "_nobody else's."_ He put emphasis on those last two words like she was some sort of prize to him. He was not allowed to call her "Mon," anymore, it made her feel sick. Suddenly Monica felt herself being forced on to the bed. Too week to fight back, she lay there with her eyes clenched shut, waiting for the pain to end. By the time it was over she felt numb and just wanted to die.

"_Why didn't I choose Chandler?" _was her last thought before drifting into a deep dreamless sleep.

* * *

The next morning when she woke up Richard was gone to work. She got up like a zombie and got dressed. She grabbed some money to get a bus, since Richard had taken the car. She scrawled down something on a piece of paper before leaving the house and going to the bus stop. She took the bus all the way down to as close to the beach as she could get and walked for a while, very hungry as she eaten breakfast, not that she cared, considering what she was about to do.

She eventually reached her destination, a cliff overlooking the rocky water. She was glad she lived near this place, as it would make the whole process quicker. She looked down for a second before closing her eyes and throwing herself off of the cliff…

* * *

Chandler Bing was a broken man, nothing more than a shell. It had been almost three years since Monica had chosen Richard over him. He tried going on dates but it never worked. He never got over her. He _loved_ her, even if he was angry at her.

Why did her have to talk to her about pig sex and act like he didn't want to get married? Why did he have to do be stupid, awkward, pathetic Chandler? He couldn't he act all sweet and nice like _Richard. _Stupid tree.

"Ugh," he yelled out to nobody in particular.

He remembered coming home and Joey telling him that she left. It felt like someone had ripped out his heart. His whole world had been shattered in a mere moment and he never picked up the pieces. He still lived in Apartment 20, but sometimes he didn't even know why he still lived when he had lived for her. His days mostly consisted of going to work, coming home and sulking. He never really talked to anybody outside of the group. He never even made any of his famous sarcastic remarks anymore. He just didn't feel like doing _anything_ anymore. God, had Joey and rest of the group tried to cheer him up, but it just never worked!

"Oh Mon, why did you leave?" he sighed, covering his head with a pillow as he lay down on the sofa, TV blaring in the background. "I hate you for breaking my heart, yet I love you for being _Monica freaking Geller." _

Suddenly he heard the door knock. He just lay there but as it kept knocking, he eventually got up and answered it out of annoyance. Suddenly Ross dashed in looking frantic.

"What's wrong?" ask Chandler, half-heartedly.

"It's Monica!" yelled Ross.

"Why would I care," groaned Chandler, not wanting to once again be reminded of her. Deep down however he really did care.

"Chandler," Ross turned to face his best friend. "Monica's in hospital. She tried to commit _suicide."_

Chandler froze, speechless and felt a deep burning anger well up inside him.

* * *

_A/N: …God, did I just write that? I feel bad for making Richard that evil, I mean I don't hate Richard! Also putting Monica through all that pain felt horrible and making my favourite character, Chandler, through all that depression made it worse! How could I break them up? Don't worry though folks, this is a Mondler fic! _

_Well anyway I'll end it there folks. Sorry that the first chapter was short, I will make the next one longer, I swear (hopefully I will get off of my ass and actually write one)! Thanks for reading and be sure to review, it'll make my day. Also, consider following this fic and check out my other fanfictions. Maybe even follow me or favourite one of my fics! Thanks!_

_~Bright101Eyes_


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